On Values

Values are so abstract. They feel limitless in scope and really difficult to pin down, particularly if you're a tired mom just trying to keep yourself together. But values can tell us a lot about not only who we are, but who we hope to be, as a mother, partner, and woman.

Brene Brown has a fantastic values activity on her website that encourages people to narrow their "values list" from an overwhelming 30+, down to 15, then ultimately down to 2. This is not for the faint of heart, or for anyone sleep-deprived and existing purely on coffee and adrenaline. But if you're in a spot where your head is somewhat clear and you can process information beyond sippy cups and Bluey, give it a shot.

Once you've defined your core values, you want to determine what you're doing every single that that supports your values, or in fact, hinders them. Surely we're doing a mix of both at all times. But the more we can parcel out what in our day aligns with our values, the more we can rid ourselves of what doesn't.

As a parent, this exercise can be confusing. What values you might prioritize for your family may not be the same values you prioritize for yourself as a person. Your partner may have completely different values as well. And that's OK! If we take the time to really define how we want our path in life to look, then apply that to our closest relationships, we all benefit. The value (pardon the pun) is not in sticking a label on our goals or putting our entire being down on paper; the value is in the process of self-discovery along the way.